Tuesday, June 23, 2009

You've Got Something to Say - Say It! Please Say It!

I've been blogging now off and on since October 2008, and for me, it's not just merely a avenue of self expression. It's a way of reaching out, sometimes to get back what I'm needing and sometimes giving what I think needs to be given. I've got something to say!
But so do you!
Many of my friends and aquaintances don't understand this blogging.
Man! I've got people in my life that don't even know how to use a computer, or have one and don't use it, they're missing out!
What are they missing out on?
Internet hugs, support in unusual ways, connection with the outside world, realizing we are not alone in our struggles, others are going through similar trials. Encouraging words of love and support just when you need them in a way that's just right for you.
Everytime I write, I think........ "I wonder if they'll read it. Why do I keep doing it? I bet if I quit writing, nobody would even miss me." (There's a huge pity party going on here, but it drives me CRAZY!)
I write because it is the easiest way for me to communicate what I'm feeling.
To those who don't know me very well...... yet. I am a 37 year old mother of 4 so far.
I home-school all of them and my two neices, run my own online business, maintain house and home, help where I can when I can, oh and by the way..........
I have a mild form of cerebral palsy.
I don't let it slow me down much though. Oh no. I've got too much to do and say and experience. However, it does get in my way sometimes.
There are times when my brain knows exactly what it's trying to communicate but the mouth and the body send out a completely different message.
For example, my two year old just woke up in a Horrible mood. I meant to hit SAVE and continue writing this later. I hit PUBLISH.
So, let's try this again. I'm often mis-understood, and it gets really frustrating.
I have one friend who constantly mis-reads my words, actions and emotions.
Continually trying to explain my real intentions or thoughts or feelings is exhausting.
As I said in an my previous post, I'm currently reading Stepping Heavenward by Mrs E.Prentiss. It's a wonderful, inspiring book for any woman going through changes, trials and tough times.
I know each one of us have our own story to share.
Mrs. Prentiss wrote Stepping Heavenward in a journal format.
The main character is Kate, who begins writing this journal on her sixteenth birthday and allows us to follow her journey heavenward through her life as a young girl, wife, mother and daughter to God.
She learns through her struggles, only God can truly set you free. Only in God can you find true happiness, and it's only when you learn to depend solely on him and give your life away to serving Him and helping others that you find the true meaning of life in this world, LOVE. And that LOVE, His LOVE leads you to a life of fullfillment more than you can ever imagine.

Remember the person I spoke of that often mis-understands me?
Kate has many people like that in her life, as do all of us. What did she learn through each trial and struggle?
She prayed.
"God, give the strength to love them. Show me how to love them."
He does just that.
So I will keep writing, and I will keep explaining myself, and I will continue to pray,
" God show me how to love them more and more."

Thank you to each and everyone of you who take a moment to read this blog, and follow along with me on my journey.
Thank you for your comments. They mean so much to me.
Without these comments, I doubt I would continue on, but we all need inspiring.
We all need encouragement and support, each in our own way.
May we continue to grow and journey together.

You've got something to say - say it!!
We'll never truly know the impact we make on this world until Jesus' face we see.
until then...... enjoy the youtube video I've posted here
The song and lyrics You've got Something to Say by Matthew West. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSVGocVpLko

Amy

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Trusting In and Depending On God - Continually Learning

I love how God talks to us.
Non-believers and skeptics may scoff at us for saying God still speaks to us today, but it is true.
God does speak to the "heart," of man (and woman), in his own way.

Jeremiah 29:11-14a says (NIV)
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 12 Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. 14 I will be found by you," declares the LORD, "and will bring you back from captivity.

and Matthew 13 says
15For this people's heart has become calloused;they hardly hear with their ears,and they have closed their eyes. Otherwise they might see with their eyes, hear with their ears, understand with their hearts and turn, and I would heal them.'[a] 16But blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear. 17For I tell you the truth, many prophets and righteous men longed to see what you see but did not see it, and to hear what you hear but did not hear it.

God does speak to his children today - in his own way.
1Peter 6-7 says
6In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.

1 James 2:7
2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. 6But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; 8he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.

We were all created for fellowship with God, first and foremost. God will and is using all things to draw men to himself so that through us his glory might be shown.

If you've been following my blog, you might have read between the lines that I am one who claims to know God, love God and Trust in the Lord. Yet when trials and test come, I am but a child, who hasn't handle things as well as I should if I was truly maturing and trusting in him.

I fail him over and over and over..........and yet......... "He still loves me," (from the book Stepping Heavenward by Mrs. E Prentiss).

He told me to Trust in Him in Proverbs 3. He told me not to be anxious about anything in Philippians 4, and yet I did not listen. I fretted, I worried. I allowed myself to be swept up in the currents of emotional and mental turmoil instead of resting in his loving grace, and I have suffered the consequences. Much like the prodigal son, I left my father's care and did things my own way. Things have not gone well for me and now my health has suffered from my foolishness.

Thank you to the women in my life who have all recommended the book Stepping Heavenward by Mrs. E Prentiss.
Thank you to the people in my life who are constantly praying for me that I might understand how deep and how wide the Father's love is for me.

God is working through all these means to draw me to himself.
I am seeking Him, his wisdom, knowledge and grace and I am learning to trust, lean and depend on him more and more.

My health is improving. God has let me see that through my own doing of fretting and worrying, I let my body get depleted of some very important nutrients and building blocks necessary to have the health to do what God has called me to do.
Please do keep me in your prayers as I am now learning how to eat properly and take better care of my body so that God may get all the glory.
I am spending more and more time Walking in God's Word and Talking with Him in prayer.
I am learning to be content, not to fret, worry, or be anxious about anything. Instead I must learn to Trust in Him, Acknowledge Him and Let Him Direct my path.
Life will not be without test or trials but.....
"6being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Philippian1:6 NIV)

He Love Us,
Amy